I do mind questions about fertility treatments, even though they were natural. I’m also a little confused - I was 22 when they were born, do I seem a likely candidate for long-term infertility? I suppose some 22-year-olds have had IVF, but it seems like it would be pretty rare.

Like Amanda, I also mind, “Oh, it must be nice to be done!” I usually respond laughingly with, “Oh, I hope we’re not!” but I’m seething a little underneath. Are my children a tragedy whose reoccurance should be prevented? I think not! And the woman who asked, “Are you going to have any more?” and then seemed shocked and horrified when I said “I hope so!”

“Double trouble” bugs me unless my children are currently running in two different directions or other exhausting behaviors. Either way, I respond with “twice as nice.” I don’t mind “I don’t know how you do it!” - yeah, that’s probably true. You just really don’t know how it is done until you do it yourself.

Comparison / guessing questions bug me. Everyone thought Lenora was a boy because she was five pound heavier even when she was wearing pink and Iliana blue, or thought Lenora was older because of she was bigger and how strong she was (it’s one minute difference, for Heaven’s sake, it doesn’t really change who hits the milestones first). A few thought Iliana must be ill because she was visibly smaller than Lenora. A few people asked me if I was sure they were twins, LOL! That was just too absurd to take seriously.

Breastfeeding questions I enjoy. This area is very friendly to breastfeeding, and I like to think that I may be a good example to someone who thinks breastfeeding would be too difficult or is worried that she wouldn’t have enough milk.

Anyone get weird comments during pregnancy? Not annoying, but funny was how many people heard that they were both girls and said, “So that means that they are identical?” They corrected themselves pretty quickly, but it was funny.

We get the concieved question quite a bit which is I find amusing generally and like to quip that I can barely plan for dinner let alone anything more complicated than that. Although I didn’t do IV so I am not sensitive about that aspect. I actually am one of those mythical people that didn’t find out about my twins until a month before I had them. That was a heck of a shock. I tell people about that because it is so amusing in retrospect. I also do not know if my twins are identical or not so I just tell people that I don’t know. If they want more information I am glad to go into the technical twinning bits which I find fascinating and most folks find TMI lol. That’s what you get for asking!

I am consider myself to be a breastfeeding advocate, I don’t mind sharing about that aspect at all. I will even share that I tandem nursed my son for 18 months after I had the girls if the conversation is more than just polite chatter. I also like to joke about the National Geographic-esque sight of tandem nursing toddlers. Then again I live in Oregon and this is a very pro-breastfeeding area.

I generally don’t mind most of this stuff, but if I do, I just feel free to excuse myself and go about my way. We walk most every day and I am a stay at home Mom so I have time if the kiddos are doing well. Sometimes these conversations with strangers are the adult interaction I get in a day. Most of the conversation is nice and admiring. Nice ego boost if you are feeling low about your parenting skills. I always like the exclamations of “I don’t know how you do it!”

Btw, Emmie, I would totally say that to your BIL rofl!! I have to say about the same father comment, I have gotten that one as well. WHAT were they thinking lol?! If I am feeling really katty about the “Are they twins?” comment, I tell them that no they aren’t. One is my husband’s mistress’s child and I am just an extremely kind person.

I always enjoy people commenting on how cute the boys are, but “you have your hands full” really doesn’t have any answer. I just smile and say “yes, I do, but it’s fun!” I don’t think anyone has ever asked us about fertility treatments or if I breastfed. I have had a lot of people say “They can’t be twins, they don’t look anything alike!” Comments on age or size are fine, too. I think that anything you wouldn’t mind answering yourself is generally a good rule. I’m really bad for commenting on babies in the mall, singletons, twins, etc. I’ll always poke my husband as I peer in the stroller and say “Oh, how sweet!” It drives him nuts, but it makes the parents smile, and that’s what counts.

Inadvertent error, apologies!

NO TOUCHING! No touching the bellies of pregnant women! No touching babies that are strangers to you! Would you walk up to a random person on the street and start rubbing their tummy or sticking your fingers in their mouths?

And as I’ve said before, I have only one child by choice, so I get the “tsk, tsk, poor thing, problems conceiving?” type stuff. So I feel for you moms of multiples who get the ridiculously invasive “so, tell me ALL about how your fancy parts aren’t working” questions.

But my favorite - having nothing to do with multiples - is when someone asks a person with both biological and adopted children…”so, which ones are your real children?” Uh, those over there…the others are teeny but remarkably lifelike mannequins.

But yeah, boundaries must be respected above all, and a little sensitivity to whether this mom you want to approach looks like someone who is in the mood for random stranger attention.