Most Amusing Search Phrases
I occasionally get hit by some weird Google searches.
sleep deprivation penis larger - Who puts those things all together and searches for them?
julia in leather pants - Huh?
plumber nightgown - I don’t want to know.
And for all of you who get here searching for things like “pregnancy labor starters”, “cant sleep pregnant labor”, “false labor contractions” or “pregnancy 39 weeks crying” I’ve been there. Nothing is going to jump start your labor. I tried walking, eating spicy food, sex. Nothing helped. It was miserable. But it ended. Yours will too.
Stumble it!
Donate to the Zoë and Lennox Simpson Memorial Fund
and the 529 college savings accounts get a kickback.
April 24th, 2007 16:46
ok, so *why* were you doing those random searches?
April 24th, 2007 18:43
The most disturbing thing leading to mine was “naked little girl.”
April 24th, 2007 19:04
Paige — I have a widget thingy - a technical term - that records searches that hit me.
Eva — That is creepy.
I got a lot for “sleep porn” right after I wrote http://twinkies.bastetweb.com/2007/02/21/sleep-porn/. I suspect that those searchers were, by and large, deeply disappointed.
April 24th, 2007 22:08
Those are very strange, indeed! I always wonder what they hell people are searching for when I see odd searches.
April 24th, 2007 22:41
That’s why I had to take my site off google and put up a robots.txt file to keep search engines away. From my searches, I, apparently, am one fantastic location for all things lesbian. Who knew?
April 25th, 2007 07:11
You’ll never know what google wants you to do. A friend of mine wanted to check on some music legal download and typed that, google replied- you mean illegal music download
April 25th, 2007 08:35
All right, Julia…uh, I mean STACIE…let’s have pics of the leather pants!
April 25th, 2007 11:04
ok, just read your “sleep porn” post. Wow, after the night of bloody hell here last night that sounds simply orgasmic to me.
btw - how do you get the widget thingy (technical term) to tell you what searces are leading to your page? Is it Google Analytics?
April 25th, 2007 11:47
Ladies, Stacie could not be more wrong about this. Sex works. I mean really, really well. It really does. Honest. You should try it with your husband or partner. Several times, in fact. A day.
Works great.
Trust me.
And how DARE you think this is self serving!
April 25th, 2007 13:38
Of course, Poker, you do realize that sex with a woman 8 months or more pregnant with twins is more comical (and acrobatic on the part of the partner) than, well, sexy? Right?
April 25th, 2007 17:47
Hey, when you’ve been cut off as long as I have, you’ll take it.
And I’m all about comedy.